


Echoes

by itslaurenmae



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars - The Last Jedi - Fandom, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Light Angst, Post-Canon, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Slow Burn, Slow Burn Rey/Kylo Ren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-21
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-07 04:01:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13426368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itslaurenmae/pseuds/itslaurenmae
Summary: Set sometime after the Battle of Crait: the Force Bond has closed, leaving both Rey and Kylo feeling uncertain - about their relationship and the state of the galaxy. Caught between not wanting to think too much about the other or surrendering to a lonely life devoid of connection, they grapple with the choices they've made and what the future holds.





	Echoes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ophvelias](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ophvelias/gifts).



> Hello, and Happy Valentine's Day Reylo Exchange! First, I want to thank you for your request and for your direction. Second, I want you to know that I really enjoyed writing this, and third, I hope you'll enjoy reading it just as much. <3

it’s a tragedy, that our love only grows stronger   
the more space is put between us  
it’s a wonder, that our love only grows more faithful  
the more we rely on each other's echoes

-[Firelight and Smoke](https://fireandsteelofangels.tumblr.com/post/161994295932/bring-him-back-to-me-and-while-i-wait-ill-stay), _Abby S._

* * *

Rey couldn't remember how long it had been since she'd spoken to Ben. Weeks, months? _Too long_. But there was no way she was going to spend time pining over it - no, he'd made his decision, and she'd made hers, and she was sticking to it.

  
He asked her to join him.

  
He'd even said please.

  
That hadn't stopped the crashing wave of disappointment she felt as soon as she realized he had no plans of helping the remaining Resistance.

  
She ached to go back to that day, to before their confrontation with Snoke, so she could discern exactly what his plan for After was - so she could influence him to do the right thing.  
But no, he had loftier sight than she did, saw a future where they were beyond the lore of the Rebellion, the Resistance, the First Order, the Jedi, and the Sith. And perhaps, on another day, when her friends and what little remained of the Resistance weren't being picked off one-by-one by the First Order, being shot at like fish in a barrel, she could have had a different answer.

  
It wasn't fair. None of this was about fairness, though. Nothing was fair during war.

  
Rey didn't want to spend another moment thinking about Kylo Ren - partly because she was upset with herself for how much she wanted to go back to that day, and partly because she worried that the longer she thought about him, the more likely it would be for the Bond to open again - and she wasn't sure she could bear that.

* * *

Kylo Ren sat alone on the throne. His throne. Before any of this had happened, he imagined the seat would feel better than it did. But he wouldn't admit that to anyone, especially Hux.

  
Instead of feeling powerful when he sat there, he felt... like an imposter. Unclean. Unworthy, dirty. 

  
He'd killed his Master, and it had been the best decision of his adult life. But it was a triumphant secret he had to bear alone, in silence. He couldn't tell anyone in the First Order about it, and the only person who could possibly know or understand was nowhere to be found.

  
Instead of swallowing his pride and admitting the truth to himself, he sat uncomfortably upon the throne built of lies - lies about how strong he was, lies about who his real enemy was, lies about how that enemy died. He was disgusted by his duality, and when he was alone in his quarters at the end of each day, he still wished to be free of this pain. Nameless pain that persisted even after he thought he'd killed his past.

  
He dreamed about things being different - what it could have been like if things had gone differently that day. How she could have been by his side - his match, his helpmeet, his equal in every way. How they could be so much More together. He longed for the days they'd pop into each other's view unexpectedly, she walking gracefully in the rainy mist, he sweating and spent from training.

  
The days passed. The war continued. The bond stayed closed.

* * *

The loneliness began to creep back in, just a little bit at a time.

  
It came when she couldn't sleep, too wound up from the hours and hours stuck in council sessions. She wasn't made to sit and strategize - no, she was built to find things, to go, to explore, to press on. The only solace she found from the constant barrage of meetings and people talking was when she was alone training.

  
She'd kept up at her forms, but was afraid to meditate, because what if she did that and he showed up? She couldn't look on his face - it would hurt too much. Not after all they'd shared while she was on Ahch-To. She'd see the scar she'd given him, remember the way his brow creased when he told her she was everything, the look on his face when she'd shut the door to the Falcon on Crait; she couldn't guarantee that her heart wouldn't burst.

  
She knew it was wrong, but she couldn't help herself from daydreaming about the night they touched hands in her hut. That had changed everything.

  
He was more real to her that night than anything else ever had been in her life. More than thoughts of her parents, more than Luke, more than Han, more than the Falcon or the visions she had at Maz Kanata's.

  
She'd called him Ben and he hadn't corrected her. That had to mean something, right?

  
She thought she'd gotten through to him. She had been wrong.

  
All she ever wanted was to have Home. A family. Somewhere she belonged. And while she was in and around the Resistance every waking moment, she still felt Other. She was no politician, she was no warrior, and while she was a competent pilot, she had no desire to join a squadron. She wanted to wander. She was a scavenger.

She was Rey. Just different. He was the only person she'd ever had parity with.

* * *

The loneliness came for him again and again the longer he sat on that throne. Mocking him, calling him a false idol, a puppet, a sham. It had Snoke's voice and every syllable was venom. He stopped praying to the ghost of his grandfather a long time ago now - there was no solace in the stories of Anakin Skywalker anymore.

  
He was completely off-book - not a Jedi, not a Sith, not a Solo or a Skywalker. He couldn't let himself think about what would happen after the war with the Resistance ended... if it ever would. He found himself wishing that it would never come to an end, not if it meant he could see her again.

  
When had it all become so complicated? So much more, bigger than themselves?

  
All she'd ever wanted was a family, to be seen, to belong.

  
All he'd ever wanted was approval, validation, someone who wasn't scared of who he could be.

  
Maybe in another time, another life, they could have that. They could be together.

No war.

No sides, no factions.

_Balance._

  
But that wasn't the reality, and there was no promise it ever would be.

* * *

 It came back when they least expected it - nothing significant set it off, no major deaths, no violence, no victories. There wasn't a holiday or celebration, nor had there been mourning or a great loss.

It was just a day, like any other.

She was walking down the corridor of the reestablished Resistance base.

He was outside, taking in the twin suns setting on Tatooine.

She thought he was just some man at first, some vision of something yet to come. But no, this wasn't just any man. This man was Ben Solo, the trappings of Kylo Ren long gone. Gone were the dark robes, the harsh, metallic clasps and buckles, the mask. His hair and beard had grown; he wore simple canvas robes, a thick leather belt and practical boots. He had the same dark hair and piercing stare he'd always had, and something in his eyes told her things his voice would not.

_He looked like home._

She swore she could smell the desert air around him. With a lump in her throat and her heart bursting, she collapsed the distance between them.

He couldn't believe his eyes, thinking he'd just been staring at the sunset too long. But no, he wasn't seeing things - she was here, _really here,_ with him.

She looked more polished than he'd expected - all her hair atop her head in a bun, wearing beautifully handcrafted grey robes. Her saber hung at her hip, ferocity and fealty radiated around her. Regal was the word that came to mind.

Even though the light on her face was cool, her skin looked as sun-kissed as ever. He ached for her now as he had every passing day the bond stayed closed. _His Rey, his light._

He fell to his knees in front of her.

"Ben." She cried as he clung to her waist, held him steadfast as he melted into her.

"Rey." He breathed her in like the start of a new morning.

Echoes, now embodied.

* * *

we said more with a look than we ever could with any language  
and every time he gave me his hand, a new universe was born  
and with each passing second, more of me belongs to him

-[Firelight and Smoke](https://fireandsteelofangels.tumblr.com/post/161994295932/bring-him-back-to-me-and-while-i-wait-ill-stay), _Abby S._

 

 

 

 


End file.
